Post A Joke

Subject: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 6:43 am

Quite simple really, post your jokes in here, I get a few from my friends though txt msg so thought be good to post them here, good, bad or ugly we are all grown up to know jokes are just that jokes! So if you're easily offended dont look at this topic!! Lol

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:44 am

The FA have confirmed that Duran Duran are to release Englands Euro 2012 song.
'His Name Is Rio And He Watches From The Stand'.

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:45 am

Gotta new job at the old folks home as a comedian.Bless em, they dont get the jokes . . . . . . but they still piss themselves!

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:45 am

Liverpool have said Ken Dodd is to be the next manager so they dont have to change the initials on the managers coat and people wont laugh at them as much

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:53 am

Manchester united fans are breathing a sigh of relief, apparently there not gonna have to watch the traditional championship parade, city are gonna be doing that 200 miles north in a place called Manchester

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:54 am

I went to the doctors to find out why I cant get rid of my belly. The doctor says "You've got an over active"...and before he finished talking, I butted in with "What? Thyroid?". Doctor says "No, knife and fork ya fat bastard!"

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:55 am

Me and the wife were in the shopping centre earlier, where we rounded a corner to see a gaggle of young girls, all wearing next to nothing, pouring out of hmv."Phoarr!", I said to the wife, pointing at a gorgeous lass of about twenty. "I bet you'd fucking love to have legs like hers."She didn't respond, but I could tell she was upset.I could hear the sobs as I wheeled her up the ramp into debenhams !

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 7:57 am

The job interviewer asked "What's your full name?"
"Its John Fucking Bastard Twat Fuck Piss Flaps Parker"
"Do you suffer from Tourette's John?"
"No, but the vicar at my christening did"

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Fri May 18, 2012 8:06 am

A man walks into a bar and orders 7 shots of whiskey.

Bartender: "What's the occasion son?"
Man: "My first blowjob."
Bartender: "Well, in that case, one more on the house!"
Man: "Thanks, but if 7 can't get the taste out of my mouth, I doubt one more will help!"

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Mon Jun 11, 2012 4:16 am

Brendan Rogers is the new manager of LFC.

Classic!

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Mon Jun 11, 2012 5:00 am

LATEST TRANFSER NEWS: George Michael has just offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker.......

Apparently he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down.

Subject: Re: Post A Joke Mon Jun 11, 2012 5:03 am

Publik NME no1 wrote:: LATEST TRANFSER NEWS: George Michael has just offered Manchester United £1 million pounds to play as their striker.......

Apparently he wants 10 pricks behind him and 67,000 assholes jumping up and down.

Touche